1. No-homo bullshit
Really ironic. Kind of analogous to KPop fangirls shipping male idols together, but denying the possibility of either of shipped parties actually being gay. (I too was surprised when I found out this was a thing in KPop fandoms).
I get it, this shit is utilized as the main obstacle or some shit. Despite being straight, despite all the odds... they fell in love! Isn't that sweet?! O: ... (눈_눈) ... It's even worse when a straight guy falls in love with a gay dude. It's like BL manga creators don't know bi people exist or something.
An "offender" of the homisexual/[insert-character's-name]-sexual trope that quickly comes to mind is Yoneda Kou. I sense with my ass cheeks like that frog from "Over the Hedge" that she doesn't actually want to draw all this BL bs anymore and instead wants to draw regular crime/detective/gangsta manga. There's often at least one dude explicitly stated to be the straightest man on the planet despite fucking another dude in her manga.
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| This macho man, who even got STDs from fucking every woman on the planet, fucked his underage nephew, because he got hard, btw |
I often think to myself when such characters are present in BL manga, 'If a man feels sexual attraction towards a guy to the point he can fuck him in the ass, doesn't it make him unironically a little bit gay?'
2. WAB (wet ass 🅱️ussy)
I think Ben Sha-p-word might have actually referred to gay buttsex when he was talking about how there was some medical problem if there was a need for a bucket and a mop during an intercourse. I am not a proctologist nor I am someone who pisseth against the wall, but as far as I know assholes can't get wet by themselves. From what I saw in numerous BL manga, however, it almost seems BL mangakas really think that men can coom from their assholes. If the chocolate star is wet on its own some real chocolaty substance might be lubricating it instead, lol. I learned this factual information from a post written by an actual gay man from some KPop forum that to my disappointment no longer exists, so I take his words as a fact till this day.
3. It's your fault you made my PP hard, take responsibility!
This is about scenes in BL where a turned on "seme" wants to immediately copulate with an "uke" right then and there with the use of force. At this moment, I think to myself, 'Are you an animal that can't control itself or what?' Peepee hard cannot not fuck right now!
Basically, a bad writer (coming from a 1st grade writing style possessor) can't make the main duo get it on in organic way and to expedite things this bs tactic is used.
When I see this cliche in BL manga, I start to take it even less seriously. It's ok when both parties are horny for each other.
4. Rape ==> love somehow
Bad writing problem as in the previous point stemming from lack of skills/time/fucks/etc to make protagonists naturally fall in love with each other. Makes me deduct points in my head if the story is meant to be taken seriously.
Example that is coming to mind is a seemingly popular BL manga in the past "The Tyrant Falls in Love". There're some hot sex scenes, but overall it's a painful reading experience somewhat coming from how the main couple's continuous relationship started (manipulative protagonist raped his homophobic tsundere senpai when they were drunk).
Another example – "Hidoku Shinaide" where a megane dude gets raped and blackmailed by an iljin. As far as I remember, the iljin's cousin even knew about it, but didn't do anything substantial about it. How are we going to move the plot of them eventually falling in love if we address the situation?? Plot? What plot? BL doesn't need this thing called plot. Fuhgettaboutit. It also doesn't help that the protagonist is a naïve no-personality dumb doormat.
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| "I'm sorry our son did such heinous thing to you! We will talk to him sternly. He will reflect and come back with a more mature image." |
For example, an exception that comes to mind – one-shot called "Giglio". The art is kinda hot and the rapist's dick gets melt off in the end, oops.
I think rape just like death of characters should be used sparingly and lead to sizeable changes in serious media. It's better not to have it at all in the first place, if the mangaka is going to dance around the consequences or awkwardly try to justify the actions of the offending character and want the reader to take the manga seriously. Besides, it's ten billion percent hotter when both consenting characters enjoy themselves.
5. Draw a girl, call her a boy
In some cases, it's clear the mangaka just can't draw "non-tops". I don't want that female anatomy bs in my gay buttsex pr0n! Only male males are welcome! (but no bara, pls, lol)
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| No, it's not a manga cover for a straight hentai. This's an egregious ugliest example for your and my viewing pleasure. _(´ཀ`」 ∠)_ |
6. "Uke's" wee wee hard ==> he likes forceful sexual interaction, reacts to "seme's" advances
As far as I've heard wenuses can get hard without even boner havers noticing. And physiology != psychology or some shit. I wonder how real gay people feel about this one, hmm.
7. Love at first sight/Destined to be together
I want to read more of developing relationship type of stories like Takanaga Hinako's "Kimi ga Koi ni Oboreru" instead of "they met once, glanced at each other for 10*10^(-9) seconds, therefore they're meant for each other" plot. It's more interesting when the couple gradually develops feelings for each other throughout the course of the manga, if the romance is the main tag and it's not one shot.
8. Allergy to verse action
I once "stumbled" on a gay homemade amateur pr0n with two Asian guys participating in a gay sexual act involving reverse positions and I thought it was hot as fuck. Unfortunately, BL is mostly limited to strict top-bottom "roles". Bottoming is not emasculating, nor topping is an alpha chad pro-gamer move, but the BL "semes" act like bottoming is the end of their manhood or something. I get it, preferences and shit, but more verse shit would be dope.
The first example that comes to mind is a 3D live action BL (I'm sorry for insulting it like that) called "No Regret". Reverse sex scenes in that film were hot, man. BL mangakas should take a note.
9. BL with the end goal being something other than love doesn't exist or is very rare
Most BL is either comedy, melodrama and in most cases slice of life. I want to see more genres where in the end it's not a goal for the protagonists to fall in love with each other, but it's a side mission.
I want exciting plot not necessary revolving around romance aspect, but more ballsy than YoI (great anime, just want less potential doubling down about the main duo's relationship) or less boring than No. 6.
Great example of what I want in this case is Alex Jones' favourite anime about gay frogs "Sarazanmai" made by the madlad Kunihiko Ikuhara who actually had to lie to some TV broadcast company higher-ups to make it possible for his bizarre anime to even appear on TV. It's not BL, but there're canon gay characters (cops and the protagonist's childhood friend). Scenes with gay cops, in particular, were fun to watch and these characters had actual weight in the story. I think it's a first non-BL anime where a male character actually fucking said "Aishiteru/Aisuru" (I love you with a hard r) to another guy and actually meant it 100. (Tokyo Ghoul's best boy Hide lols @ fujos in the distance in the ch. 148. I bet that chapter farmed many BL doujinssis, though, hehe). "Sarazanmai" – good shit, recommend it.
I swear I would nut in my pants if I ever live long enough to see an actual good hype shounen or another non-BL animu with the protagonist explicitly ending up with another dude.
10. Cringy or unoriginal manga titles
I'll pretend for a moment I pick BL manga to read based on synopsis and title and not manga cover alone, haha.
For example, Super Lovers. What the fuck is that title? It doesn't tell me anything interesting about the manga unless it's some "그룹 이름 (group ireum = group name) => Groovy Room" type of word play when in reality the story is actually good minus some moments.
11. Webtoon-ish copy paste art style or just terrible drawing in general
There are times when I choose a manga to read with a deceivingly good cover art the mangaka pulled a couple of all-nighters for, but as soon as I see this copy-paste webtoon art style or just ugly art cough Junjou Romantica cough down the line, it makes me not want to continue reading. I immediately associate the manga with a stupid cringy fanfiction plot, since some Lezhin webtoons that I've stumbled on had pretty terrible art styles and were so laughably dumb that that ugly-webtoon/manhwa-art == cringy content association is saved in my mind now. In addition, braindead facial expressions in those webtoons make my skin crawl.
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| An egregious example of a dumb looking face from some webtoon with that terrible line nose goddammit I hate looking at it |
I say this, but get no qualms about Shoowa's manga, which usually doesn't have the prettiest drawing, haha.
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